Starting Off This Thing Called A New Life

            Well I have done it. I have decided to take on the risk of starting a blog and here is where I have decided to start. It's new so of course I have no idea what I am doing or even if anyone will care to read what I have to say but maybe in some weird way it will help me...like therapy from this thing I call A New Life for US...

            Why do I call it this name, this very vague name? Well it’s simple really and while I am making this sound more complicated then it actually is I still feel like I need to explain myself. I was a stay home mother for many years, 17 to be exact minus the one time I went to work and ended up having to quit because my ex couldn’t handle watching our son, but in that time the only thing I ever started was going back to school for something to do I never put any weight on it because I figured “this is my life”. Unhappy doesn’t even begin to start how I felt for many of those years, which is a funny thing because you can make yourself “feel” like your happy and everything is right on track but when you really sit down and think about it you know it’s not. I did this for many years I made myself believe I was happy and everything was going great in my life including giving in to almost everything he asked for. I let him do what he wanted without ever really saying I had enough even the time I found out there were others. Not one of my strongest or proudest moments.

            Marriage is hard, very hard and both people have to want to give the most they possibly can. That wasn’t the case in mine when one was happy or at least content the other wasn’t and that’s just a recipe for disaster. Throw kids into the mix and things are even harder because now you have these little lives you are solely responsible for. You make them who they become as humans. It’s up to the people who raise children to make sure they can survive in this thing called life and as my children grow older I become even more aware of this.

            It’s been a little over two years since the separation and as I blog more the life I lived will come out I am sure but in that time I have learned many things and accomplished many things. This blog will reflect as I learn more and will show the struggles of raising children with two parents that to be honest only get along for them most days. My children in no way have everything they want or need and they have a hard time a lot of time with trying to understand everything that has happened to them and continues to happen but I try my hardest to make them aware that mom is here no matter what happens and that they are important.

            The ups and downs of going between homes and dealing with mom and dad’s lives aren’t easy at all on them. I am not sure I would have thought they could be this strong but they have proven me wrong more than once in the last two years and I couldn’t be a more proud mom. Every day we have something new we are learning from each other and this all makes it A New Life for US…

            And by the way last June I finished that degree I had worked on and my children stood next to me at my graduation proud of their momma.